Key & Peele – Consequences

[school bell rings] [indistinct chatter] OKAY, STUDENTS, SETTLE DOWN. SETTLE DOWN. THAT INCLUDES YOU, MR. RODRIGUEZ. DO YOU WANT TO TAKE THE MILK CARTON OFF OF YOUR HEAD? THANK YOU SO MUCH. WE HAVE A SPECIAL GUEST TODAY. HE’S FROM THIS NEIGHBORHOOD, AND HE’S A FORMER GANG MEMBER, AND HE’S COMING HERE THIS MORNING TO […]

Chappelle’s Show – Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories – Prince – Uncensored

I CAN RECALL ANOTHER ONE, LIKE, IN, YOU KNOW I THINK IT WAS IN ’85, LIKE, WHEN ALL THAT ANDROGYNOUS S**T WAS GOING ON, AND WHAT WAS WILD WAS THAT THE GUY WHO LOOKED THE MOST LIKE A BITCH WAS GETTING ALL THE WOMEN. EVEN I HAD IT– THE JERRY CURL WAS COMING OUT, AND […]

Tom Segura Overdoses – This Is Not Happening – Uncensored

– This woman goes “Hey Tom, you are in the emergency room and you overdosed.” And they’re like “what did you take?” So, I write, ‘Heroine.’ And they go “Are you serious?” And, I write, “Jk.” (intense dubstep music) – [Ari Shaffir] Welcome to ‘This Is Not Happening’ presents one crazy night. So, this is […]

No Regrets: How a Trump Supporter May Have Voted to Destroy His Own Career – The Daily Show

>>PRESIDENT TRUMP IS DETERMINED TO BUILD THE WALL.>>WE HAVE TO CLOSE DOWN OUR GOVERNMENT. WE’RE BUILDING THAT WALL.>>BUT TRUMP’S WALL WOULD RUIN FRAGILE ECOSYSTEMS, BREED XENOPHOBIA AND EVEN DESTROY SOMETHING RICH WHITE PEOPLE CARE ABOUT — >>IF TRUMP BUILDS HIS WALL, THEN IT WILL GO RIGHT THROUGH OUR GOLF COURSE.>>IF BUILT, TRUMP’S WALL WOULD CUT […]

Key & Peele – Fronthand Backhand

– ‘SUP, LADIES? – WATCH THIS, WATCH THIS. YO, TYRELL. – YO, WHAT UP, LAWRENCE? – HEY, MAN, YOU WANNA PLAY FRONT HAND, BACK HAND? – I DON’T KNOW THAT GAME, MAN. – IT’S EASY, DOG. ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS SAY “FRONT HAND” OR “BACK HAND.” – AIGHT, FRONT HAND. – UGH! [all laughing] […]

Key & Peele – Auction Block

– ALL RIGHT, Y’ALL GATHER ROUND. GATHER ROUND. WELCOME, GENTLEMEN. WHAT A BEAUTIFUL AND BLESSED DAY FOR AN AUCTION. ALL RIGHT, Y’ALL, GET ON UP THERE. – PUT THAT WHIP DOWN AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS, THOUGH. – STRAIGHT UP. I DON’T CARE WHAT PLANTATION I END UP ON. I’M STRAIGHT STAGING A REVOLT IN THIS […]

Tosh.0 – Web Redemption – Football-to-the-Face Girl

– Auburn looking for its firsthome conference win since 2014.[whistle shrills] – I got it! I got it! I got it! – Whoa! – Could be worse. She could have been at Baylor. That’s Ashley, and if we go to the replay, we will see that she did not have it. This is what happens […]