Making A Strangler – The Office US


You know who’s not gonna get to work on some exciting new startup this year? George Howard Skub A.K.A the alleged scranton strangler Because he’s in prison for something he may not have done. I’m sorry the, uh, Scranton who? Scranton strangler George howard skub haven’t I told you about the jury I was on a couple years ago? Oh! What happened I mean if you can’t talk about it obviously because have you can’t I mean- I I could I could talk about it. See you next Christamas. sure, uh, have a seat. I would start at the beginning, but I think I need to go farther We should really have the offices air quality tested and we have radon coming from below we have asbestos in the ceilings These are silent killers. You are the silent killer, go back to the Annex You’ll see I decided to give baby Halpert a newspaper from the day she was born This frame set me back 55 bones But she decided to take her sweet time so now I have to switch it with today’s paper With this move he can’t get you. Well. I think that you could counter that move, the Scranton strangler is a professional strangler Oh please I wish he’d come after me I would be like- [off camera] Dwight Shrute? Stop. Too late. if I was the real Scranton strangler, you’d be so strangled by now If you’re out there strangler you will get caught. By me! Sounds like someone’s really trying to convince us that he’s not the Scranton strangler To my chickens, I’m the Scranton Strangler next up, Secretary Schrute will read the minutes from Sunday’s meeting Minutes from previous meeting of knights of the night No, Jim Hey! This meeting is for Knights of the night only. Knights are the night our volunteer crime patrollers We’re often compared to the guardian angels, but we could not be more different from them Seriously, we are nothing like the Guardian Angels I mean broad strokes purposes? sure think guardian angels. one of our many recent good deeds. We set out to capture the Scranton strangler mission accomplished not by us Hey, Toby Want to ask you a question . Um, it’s a little personal. Let’s to it. Let’s get personal I want to talk to you about your divorce Woah Sorry I- no no what I meant was- Actually what I meant was- it’s Okay I can handle it. So you guys obviously went through some tough times Okay I was wondering if you ever did any couples counseling? Oh sure lots of times yeah Wait you and Pam are in couples counseling. Are you? Oh God no, no we’re just starting couples counseling Which doesn’t sound any better You guys. Kelly called it, 2015 Hey hey hey no, no get out of here Clark get out of here, My mistake… yes, it is your mistake some lingering silly… ah im gonna kill him They caught the scranton strangler! they trapped him in his house. He’s believed to be inside Police have now surrounded the apartment complex Police have surrounded and we now see what appears to be a SWAT van pulling up Its SWATTs, SWATTs arriving. It is unknown if he is armed with any- They should do that thing where they play some really good music to get him to come out Shouldn’t televise any of this, just encourages copycats just say copies. Why do you have to drag cats into this okay? Well, this is interesting. We should get back to work these standoffs can last a long time. What if it’s another Waco It’s pronounced whacko some events are so newsworthy, so historic that you have to stop everything to watch, Balloon Boy Michael Jackson’s funeral Things that if you didn’t see them live, you wouldn’t really care that you didn’t see them at all Coming to you from the corner of Columbia Street in Washington Ave Ugh. Whenis he gonna come out? -Phone Rings- Bet he’s wishing he had a hybrid, right?60 miles to the gallon in the city No, I bet he’s wishing he was strangling something. Okay. That’s our street. That’s our street. He’s going down our street There it is! there it- It’s gone he went right by missed it you missed it Grandpa where were you the day the Scranton strangler was caught? well I was there kiddo I Was there And I’ll tell you what? You go sell these and buy yourself a nice spaceship how has being a minority Affected you? Well, There’s a lot of pressure from my parents to settle down and marry an Indian guy Oh good, and you resent this because- Indian guys always wear their cell phones outside their pants It’s so dorky no no no that’s not dorky, but it’s easily accessible boom like this 9-1-1 hello Scranton strangler is in the house inside the house Just put it in your pocket Hi guys hi I just wanted to let you know that I’ll be taking a leave of absence starting next week because you’ve been on the lam Because the boring police have been after you and they finally caught up with you no the opposite I was actually selected to be a juror on a very high-profile case yes the case of the horrible Redheaded sad-sack and the verdict: It was Toby and the sentence death. death to Toby Death toToby. Oh, that’s hurtful. Talk. We’ve talked about that You know what I dont interrupt your announce so- you leave these huge pauses in your sentences. what expect me to do? What’s the case Toby? well I really can’t talk about, but it’s a very high-profile case is it criminal? Yes, have we heard of it? I don’t know is it the middle school teacher who tried to turn her a foreign exchange student into a sex slave? Was that the post office guy who rubbed his penis all over the mail guys. It’s a really big deal. He’s rubbing his neck He’s rubbing his neck Scranton strangler Oh I can neither Confirm or deny this let’s just say I’ll be up to my neck in jury duty oh That was the worst joke Every day millions of Americans suffer from extreme repulsiveness someone in our myths is bringing that problem to light toby flenderson Please come up here and at the extreme repulsiveness award. Oh, that’s so mean… You gotta play along man Here he comes All right, you deserved it. I really disagree with this I Think it’s kind of hateful although I am a little happy right now to have a platform to talk about the outcome of a case that I was recently a juror On the Scranton strangler a man’s being put to death I was part of the verdict, and I’m not so sure he’s guilty Those figures I gave you they’re false no I was mad at Kevin we had a fight and I acted vindictively So I guess setup? Yes, he’s innocent I knew it. I knew it from the beginning this was a possibility. What are you talking about? I just did this now a few years ago When I was on the jury the Scranton structure How sorry might have been set up, but I felt pressure to convict. It’s gotta be tough tough, I put an innocent man on death row I’m going to the prison This afternoon I’m gonna talk to his strangler Probably best to use his ro name rather than strangler don’t use his real name george howard skub? It’s a devil name . Anyway. Just wanna say. I’m doing it. I’m going He’s doing it Hi, im toby flenderson here to see george howard skub. This is the prison I am NOT going in there with expectations per se I will meet george howard skub. I will tell him that I believe he is innocent I don’t understand if he felt motivated to hug me I Would understand if a friendship began not it had a boggart put it. I think this is a start of my first friendship Well the good news is no more guilty conscience. least you know he is the strangler The proof is in the grip did they say when the vocal cords would heal? One week Okay two weeks Okay You offered your neck in search of the truth The proud neck of justice isn’t about the expression anyway. It was it was very brave It really was quite brave

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